It Happened Again

That somewhat panic attack kinda thingy. I dozed off at three, not three in the morning like most of ex-colleagues, ex-collegemates e.t.c would be doing but ya in the day. And after 40 odd blissful minutes I woke up, “Woah! Woah! I am sleeping , THIS is what I am doing in my life!” and then those creepy thoughts started attacking me, they go like --> “You should get a job!”

AAAAAAAAAAA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, HEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAALPPPPP

Not a S/W job, but some donkey work job with a production house or a director. But a job , to dupe myself. To lull myself into an “occupation”. Keep me busy, so my head doesn’t get to any mischief. No, I think more out of the guilt that I am “sitting” at home. Though I do go out once in a while on the research thing for this second documentary , but ya its such a cake-walk and non-taxing that I feel like I am not doing much on that.

But as is always with the wars in my head as of now I have decided …. Again …. For now…. That this was the right thing to do. Leaving my first stint with the school which took 6 days a week and choosing to work a third or maybe a lesser amount of time , but in a freelance fashion. Lets see how it goes.